My husband and I both struggle on a daily basis. We struggle with a tendency towards laziness. We’d both rather watch tv and play games and read books or blogs than do anything else. (Doesn’t everyone?) So why is it a struggle to focus on work?
We both grew up in houses where our parents worked to provide enough money for our comforts, We were fed, we had good lives, but none of our parents enjoyed their lives (their whole lives). They went to work just because they had to do it, there was no joy in working, there was no joy in things getting done. Our parents came home from their duty and started enjoying family and watching tv. Even though we knew what they did and they weren’t necessarily unhappy, it also didn’t make them happy or fill them with passion. Don’t get me wrong, I (and he) were instilled with values of duty and excellence and general succesful life tactics but I’m beginning to suspect that none of that matters as much as the fact that we were at the same time being subconsciously taught that work can never be fun.
I want to enjoy my whole life. I want to be entrepreneurial. I want to follow my passion. I want work to be fun. Now that I know that’s the problem, I’m posting this because it’s time to do something about it. It’s time to believe it every day and reprogram myself (and my husband) to think that way. Here goes.
This post has been several years in the making. When I first thought of using the internet to help me remember what I am doing, blogs were popular. Yes, sometimes I’m that far behind the times. So, why now?
Everyday I find myself dueling balance in a million ways and by the end of most days, I am no closer to finding it. Some would say that’s because I enjoy the perks that come with being an unbalanced person :-). Today, the reason I start this blog today, is because I can’t get one question out of my head. Does balance exist?
Balance, as defined by dictionary.com has 31 definitions ranging from “a stable emotional state” to “to reckon and adjust accounts.” To me, balance has always been tied to the idea of equilibrium. Give and take. My parents taught me this at young age of 5 when I first got my allowance. If I’d given my time to chores that week I was given some money, some of which I had to save, some of which I could take and spend on whatever I wanted. I quickly learned that the more cheerful I was about my chores, or to be more honest, the less I complained about them, the more money I was given. They taught me that being part of the family was rewarding to my desires as long as I also fulfilled their desires. Looking back, this was a lot to grasp as a whiny 5 year old – but I’m glad my parents thought highly enough of me to teach me.
Balance must exist as the result of understanding the system. It’s the peace that you get when you know that you have sacrificed something for something else. However, I’m years removed from my allowance days and able to look back at them now and see them as rewarding. I am beginning to challenge myself – what sacrifices do I complain about to today that are truly worth it? where can balance be found and where should it be fought?